Every leader has met it. You announce a change you’ve thought about for weeks, and the room goes cold. Arms fold. Someone asks a question that is really a statement. Two days later, nothing has moved.

The instinct is to push harder. The smarter move is to get curious, because resistance is almost always information.

What resistance is usually trying to say

• “I don’t understand why.” People rarely resist what they understand and agree with. If the reason lives only in your head, it isn’t a reason yet.
• “I’m about to lose something.” Status, competence, a relationship, a way of working they are good at. Loss needs acknowledging, not arguing with.
• “I’ve seen this before.” Previous change that failed leaves scar tissue. Cynicism is often disappointment wearing armour.
• “You’re missing something.” Sometimes the resisters are right. They can see a risk you can’t.

And sometimes the resistance is yours

We all resist growth too: the feedback we avoid, the habit we defend, the conversation we keep postponing. When I notice resistance in myself, I ask what I am protecting. The answer is usually a very old and very loyal part of me that is trying to keep me safe from something that no longer threatens me.

Four ways to work with it

1. Ask before you tell. “What worries you about this?” surfaces objections while you can still use them.
2. Name the loss. “This means giving up something that has worked well for you. I get that.” It costs nothing and lowers the temperature.
3. Invite the loudest critic in. Give them a real role in shaping how the change happens. Critics make excellent quality checkers.
4. Make the first step small. Big leaps trigger big defences. A two-week experiment is easier to say yes to than a new way of life.

Resistance is where the energy is. Treat it as a gateway, not a wall, and you will often find the change you actually needed on the other side.

Leading a team through change? Team coaching and leadership development can help the whole team move together.